Top 9 Reasons Why The Tooth Fairy Forgot Last Night

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#9
She didn't forget. See, its right here on the kitchen counter!
#8
You were supposed to leave a note on your pillow to remind her! She can't be expected to remember everything.
#7
It's possible she fell asleep in front of the TV watching a "House Hunters" marathon.
#6
This is, like, your eighth tooth, so let's pump the brakes, greedo.
#5
Maybe she stayed up too late making some goddamn gluten-free lollipop cakes for school.
#4
Maybe she only had $5 cash and really needed it for coffee in the morning.
#3
The Husband Fairy was supposed to fill in JUST THIS ONE TIME, God.
#2
"Fifty Shades of Grey" is a distracting book to read before bedtime.
#1
Too much wine—am I right, fairies?!