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You ask if you can friend them on Facebook, and they say they've "never heard of it."
Daughter writes her college essay on the most influential person in her life: her therapist.
Son's "MOM" tattoo has an asterisk and a footnote that reads "tried her best."
Your toddler has started preparing her stuffed animals for the rebellion.
Grown son writes a series of songs chronicling your flaws and threatening to murder you. (Note: Eminem's Mom only)
You ask your 3-year-old, "How much do you love Mommy?" and she responds, "Relative to what?"
Your Mother's Day card has this weird white powder in it.
Everyone seems to know about this @horriblemother Twitter account but you.
There's a bouncer stationed in front of your daughter's bedroom door, and you're not on his list.