Top 9 Ways Motherhood Prepared Me To Fight On The Front Lines

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Your mission, should your husband force you to accept it, is dealing with whatever is happening over in that Diaper Genie. Here are 9 other ways motherhood is a military all its own:
#9
You regularly effectively operate heavy machinery like a tank or a mini-van on no sleep.
#8
You learn to survive on little sustenance, such as Goldfish parts or the things in Lucky Charms that aren't the marshmallows.
#7
You will occasionally have to restrain yourself from killing someone. Sometimes it will be your assigned partner in this mission.
#6
By the end of day, you probably have paint on your face.
#5
You sneak around, ninja-like, during top-secret operations like targeted assassinations or Tooth Fairy pillow deposits.
#4
The job will probably, at some point, involve crawling around in mud.
#3
You know that once you sign up, your body will never be the same.
#2
You speak in bizarre code, like the dreaded PTA.
#1
You automatically become part of an unofficial club of instantly identifiable juice-stained battle-scarred veterans.
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