Top 9 Ways Childbirth Would Be Different If I Were Pregnant With A Killer Whale
VIA: Getty Images & Flickr: Mike Saechang
What? You know you've thought about it.
#9
Registry: Plankton plankton plankton plankton plankton plankton plankton plankton.
#8
Everyone laughed at me when I said I wanted to have an underwater birth BUT WHO'S LAUGHING NOW???
#7
Oh my god, those Animal Planet people would never leave my driveway.
#6
Could scoff at anyone complaining about how tough it was to birth a 9-lb. human baby.
#5
Cord-cutting = nightmare.
#4
Any time someone points to my belly and says, "Whoa, you look like Shamu!" I would retaliate with "THAT'S BECAUSE I AM CARRYING SHAMU!"
#3
Would finally settle the debate over who's the real father: your husband or that whale.
#2
Three words: Hardcore bathtub expansion.
#1
Child would instantly be eligible for all those college scholarships available to Whale-Americans.
