Top 9 Ways To Guarantee You'll Never Be Asked To Help With The Bake Sale Again

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#9
Roll in wearing your “Wanna Frost My Cupcakes?” apron, and nothing else.
#8
Tell the kids they can keep whatever they lick.
#7
Place “May Contain Hair” stickers on random items.
#6
Make a big deal of pointing out the low-calorie selections to the principal.
#5
Wonder aloud whether that whole food poisoning incident at last year’s sale ever got cleared up.
#4
Ask how many are in a dozen.
#3
Eat one of the PTO president's cookies and yell “Paula Deen ain’t got nuthin on this b*tch!”
#2
Wink a lot when explaining that your brownies have a “special” ingredient.
#1
Label the table with store-purchased items “Sh*t the Lazy Moms B(r)ought.”


