Your Childless Friend On: Breastfeeding

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Dear Childless Friend,

My nipples are so sore and dry. What can I do to feel better?

- Cracked

Dear Cracked,

Try rubbing lotion on each boob and then placing them in Ziploc bags overnight. Works wonders on my feet!

- Childless Friend

Dear Childless Friend,

How do I get my child to stop breastfeeding?

- Purple Nurple

Dear Nurple,

Put hot sauce on your nipples and tell him your boobs turned evil.

- Childless Friend

Dear Childless Friend,

I think my breasts might be engorged. What can I do?

- Hard and Heavy

Dear Heavy,

Oh boo hoo, my boobs are huge! Woe is me! Are your diamond shoes too tight, too?

- Childless Friend