Your Childless Friend On: Resuming Sex, Light Sockets and Nanny Confusion

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Dear Childless Friend,

When can I resume sex after giving birth?

- Eager Beaver Mom

Dear Eager,

When you can see past your waist, the time has ended to be chaste. (I majored in poetry.)

- Your Childless Friend

Dear Childless Friend,

How can I keep my toddler from sticking his fingers in light sockets?

- In the Dark Mom

Dear Dark,

Try blocking them with something. Since the holes are small, you'll need something with thin prongs. Maybe stick a fork in them?

- Your Childless Friend

Dear Childless Friend,

How can I make sure that my infant doesn't confuse our full-time nanny with his mommy?

- Guilty Mom

Dear Guilty,

Probably best to just find one with a penis.

- Childless Friend

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